Sunday, April 15, 2007

Sleep problems

The sleep problems are surprisingly not with Zachariah. He's a good sleeper, and most days he takes good naps. Lately though he is having a hard time sticking with a nap schedule, so I don't know what to expect from one day to the next.

The real issue is Matt and I. Matt likes to sleep in on the weekends. He always has. I used to sleep in on Saturdays, but like most mothers that ended when I had a baby. Matt gets to blissfully slumber for extra hours while I'm up chasing the kid around, making sure he's dressed, feeding him, and whatever else needs done. So, when Zachariah was a newborn Matt was very gracious about letting me nap on Sunday afternoons. He would watch him as long as he could, until he thought he was hungry. Then of course I had to get up, so I could nurse him. That was so nice to get a little extra rest. Lately (meaning the last several months or so), I haven't been getting those desperately desired Sunday afternoon naps. If I'm lucky, I can get a small one in when Zachariah takes an afternoon nap. Then usually by the time he wakes up, I get up to find that Matt just fell asleep on the couch. And he complains that Zac comes over and bugs him and won't let him sleep. Grr, where's a frying pan when you need one.

This all leads me to what happened on this lovely Sunday afternoon. I put Zachariah down for his nap. And since I already had a load of laundry going, I figured I may as well lay down for a while. I fell asleep right away, but about 1/2 hour or so later, I heard Zachariah. It sounded like he was in the living room, though. I could tell that Matt got him up, and they were playing. So I figured it was safe to go back to sleep. I only slept a little bit off and on for about another 1/2 hour after that. But, still it was nice to get that nap. Then as I'm laying there, I heard the bedroom door open. Then I hear a squeal of excitement from my son. Matt had let him in to wake me up. I talked to him and played with him on the bed for a little while. Matt said "He was signing 'milk', so I got him some milk. He didn't want that, I don't know what he wants." *Are you kidding me!* I felt like screaming. Why can't he figure out what the boy wants? I got up out of my nice, warm, comfy bed to get a small snack for him.

It's always been this way with Matt. I don't know if he just doesn't want to deal with problems, or if he just isn't sure what to do next. I know it was worse when Zachariah was younger. I kept telling him you just have to try different things, then if that doesn't work try something else. That's how it goes with babies. Has he still not realized that yet? I guess not. Maybe by the time Zachariah's 18 he'll get it....maybe.


Devan said...

ugh, his Sat. morning sleep ins would be OVER till he can get it together enough to return the favor.

Mommy Brain said...

Oh I feel your pain. My husband and I are still working on this. (Actually, I think all parents across the country are working on these issues.)

I hate when I get "they're crying. What should I do?" Because Moms are issued a baby cry translator? I've been trying to not give the answer directly but reply with "what do you think they need?"

desperate housewife said...

Oh, man... I have no words of wisdom. What is it with dads and this helpless card they like to pull, as though being male makes them handicapped in the art of childcare?
On the other hand, I know that sometimes when Jim HAS taken care of things on his own, such as bathing or dressing, I have done the classic no-no of correcting every little thing he did- he didn't rinse her hair well enough, her clothes don't match, he didn't put her in the warm coat, he didn't wipe her hands when she got down from her snack... And I can tell when I do this it makes him want to just not help at all. So I'm really working on biting my tongue in this area.
Not saying this is something you're doing wrong at all, though. Just something I have a problem with, perfectionist that I am.
Here is one thing I do on Saturdays though, that is maybe evil but I do it anyways. When I hear Addy wake up and go get her and change her diaper, as long as it is not unreasonably early (nine or so) I bring her back to bed with us and let her climb around and play on the bed and wake Daddy up. I want us to enjoy weekends TOGETHER, dang it, and if I have to be a little mean in the morning to make it happen, so be it!

Kelsey said...

I know that Matt thinks he'll do better when Harper's older. Although the age at which he thinks this will happen adjusts as she ages! First it was two, then four, now he's talking six; he'll be good when she's six. I think what people (men, women, all of us) forget is that much of parenting is just plain hard. So his instincts might not quite match mine, but he does try. I think he would like Harper and all our future children to magically be ten and love basketball; then he'd be good to go!

Shauna said...

I know. What's up with that? Gavin often doesn't understand what Nicholas is saying. At least Gavin will ask questions like, "I don't know what you want. What color is it?" to try and figure it out. But it never works. Nicholas always gives up and comes to me. I swear men are missing the child-translator gene. And the "wake up when the kids are up" gene (I posted about this just yesterday!)

kristi said...

I go through the same thing, I work late 1 night a week and hubby always calls me asking "Have you left work yet?" GRRR