Friday, June 22, 2007

Because he wanted beer

I have noticed a change in myself since becoming a parent. Well, really there have been many, many changes, but this is a big one. And it's not even directly child related. I am learning to be more assertive. How being a parent changes you #759.


Here's the scene: I was going to pick up pizza for a late dinner after putting Zachariah to bed. Noticing there was no more beer in the house, I offered to pick some up for Matt. He told me specifically what he wanted. I got to the store, and I could not find the kind Matt had asked for. I saw bigger packs of it, but not a smaller one. I stood there and looked around a minute of so. It was messy and hard to see everything, because there was an employee restocking there. Then the employee asked if he could help me. I said yes and told him what I needed. He looked around and spotted it. It was behind a bunch of things, so he offered to get it for me. Good. He gets the beer out and hands it to me. When I looked down at it I realized it was the "light" version, which is not what Matt requested. My first thought was just to take what he'd given me and run, because I knew Matt would drink it anyway. Then I thought, No, I am NOT going to do that. So, I told him this was not the kind I needed, and if they had the regular kind I'd prefer that. So back over the boxes and crates he went to get what I needed. And they had it, and I happily bought it and left.

Now, this may seem like a silly little thing to you, but this was huge for me. I hate confrontation. I will even eat a meal that I didn't order at a restaurant, just because I don't want to mess with the hassle of it all. I have seen myself change in this aspect over the last year or so, and I think it's mostly due to being a parent. I've learned that I have to stand up for my child and myself as a parent. Now I see this trickling into the rest of my life. I might still eat something I didn't order, but I'll definitely think about that next time.

What made this really funny is that when I got home, I told Matt about what happened and how proud I was of myself. He laughed and said "I would have just taken what he gave me the first time". Ha, I know. He's as bad as me. But if I'm getting better, maybe he can too.

4 comments:

Mommy Brain said...

Go you! My parents are way too assertive when it comes to getting good service in a restaurant, etc. I hated it (so embarassing as a teenager) and went way too far in the opposite direction. I think I'm finding a balance too. Plus, us mama bears have to be assertive enough to stick up for our baby bears.

Jennifer Playgroupie said...

I'm the exact same way! Maybe I should take a cue from you a be more assertive.

Beer works it's magic again!

desperate housewife said...

Way to go! We're not assertive about a lot of things, but I know if it was a beer issue, Jim would have had no problem with that situation, ha!

jen said...

I am definitely more assertive in my old age, possibly having to do with kids! We're just shaping up to be complainy senior citizens!

I also think a lot of my own assertiveness has to do with having a much lowered tolerance for Putting Up With Crap (from 2 and 3 year olds)