Shopping and a new "do"

I was at the mall today with Zachariah. I knew I needed to stop at Old Navy, especially after Swistle was talking all about their online sale. And yes! they had an in-store sale too.

We found this hat, and since Zachariah loves hats I thought I'd get it for him. In the store it was on sale for 1/2 price, so we got it for $2.75 YEAH! Then they had several of these polo shirts for $7.00 each. I love polo shirts, and Zachariah can wear them well.
And when I was looking on a clearance rack, I found this denim jacket. There were about 4 on the rack. 3 of them were 3T sizes, and the other one was a 12-18 month. That's about what I thought he'd wear, so I tried it on him. There is plenty of room, so I think it will make a nice fall jacket. AND it was way cheaper than it is online. There was not a tag on the size I needed, but all the others were marked $7.99. I took one of those up to the register, and he was able to ring it up that way. YEAH! Great deal. And I love it.
And the guy running the register made a good point. These would look good together. So, there you have it. Cute, huh? I think with jeans or khaki pants this will make a great outfit.
After looking online I found some other cute shirts that I just may have to go back and get. We'll see. I think a few of those long-sleeved T-shirts might be nice. And they've been giving me surveys. I fill them out online then get 10% off my purchase. That's always great.

I was disappointed the The Children's Place didn't have any sales in the store AT ALL. They have all their new fall line out, but everything else was basically gone. Hmm, I don't usually like shopping online, but maybe I will this once. I see a few things there that I'd like...like this T-shirt. Ugh, they're out of our size. Oh well, guess I won't get things from there after all.

*****

Tonight I cut Zachariah's hair...again. This is his 3rd haircut. His 2nd this summer alone. I went a little shorter this time. I didn't buzz it too short, so I'm hoping my mom won't kill me. She liked it a bit longer. I think he looks good with it like this. I'm trying to find a good "before" picture, so you can see the difference. I was able to get it pretty even, so I think it looks good.

Before (Also a funny picture. Matt found him in a box pulling all the toys in with him.)

After (Eating his snack tonight.)

Forever Friends

Last week I got to visit with an old friend from high school. She and I and a few others used to hang together all the time. We were great friends, confidants, and always had fun when we were together. We were the good girls who still knew how to have a fun time.

As to be expected, after high school we all went our own ways. We got together for weddings mostly. And we are all married now (the last of us 5 got married in December). I was the first to be married. But I was the 2nd to have a baby. My friend Brenda got married 3 years ago and got pregnant on her honeymoon or shortly after. She was the first to get pregnant. Then a year later I had my Zachariah, and two months after that our friend Sara had a little boy too. Just after I had my son, Brenda found out she was pregnant again. This girl is fertile. We have never seen each others children, except in pictures. She moved to Little Rock, Arkansas shortly after getting married. That is quite a ways away from where we both grew up in Northwest Ohio.

Brenda and her family are moving now. Her husband is starting a new job in South Bend, IN, which is so much closer. She came to visit her family while her husband is getting things moved. So she called to see if I'd like to get together while she was in the area. I went to my mom's house, because it is near where she was staying. She brought her little ones over, and we had such a great time catching up.

Unfortunately I forgot about having my camera most of the time, but I managed to steal a few shots of her kids. Brenda has not changed one bit since high school. She looks great. Also here are her children: Maggie is 27 months old and Tommy is 7 months old. They are both adorable and sweet and remind me of their mother. It took them a while to warm up to me, and even then their mom had to be nearby. I can't blame them, sometimes kids are just that way. Just because my kid isn't afraid of anyone (unless he thinks I'm leaving him), doesn't mean other peoples kids should be that way.

Zachariah was trying to make friends with all of them. When Maggie was reluctant to come in the door, Zachariah went and got a book and gave it to her. I'm not sure why he did this, but it got her inside. She loves books as much as he does. And Tommy thought it was great having another boy around. Zac wanted to hug and kiss him.

After they left my mom asked how it was seeing my friend with her children. I told her it just seemed natural. We still talked like we always have. We just had a little more catching up to do since it's been so long since we've seen each other. But since I have a child too, it didn't seem weird seeing her with the kids. I can see she has her hands full with two so close in age. It makes me feel OK about not having another one quite yet. It was also nice just to get together with another mom one-on-one like that. I don't really do that. I don't have any good mother friends.

So, Brenda taught me many things in a few hours, but here are the two most important. First, I need to keep in better touch with these friends I had in high school. We had a bond like no other. And secondly, I need to find some mommies around here to hang out with. It would be nice to have a friend nearby to hang out with and let our kids play together. I see what I've missed out on already.

Guardian Angels

While I was at my mom's house this week, my sister called. She wanted to tell us that her brother-in-law (her husband's brother) was in a car accident with his friend (who we also know). My first reaction was fear for these boys.


Jordan (a friend of Rachel's brother-in-law) was driving outside of their small town. He was going about 90MPH and then took a sharp curve way too fast. The car went off the road and through a utility pole. Rachel said they had lost power in town, but she didn't find out until a while later that this was why.


I don't know many more details, but the car is a crunched up mess. Rachel said it's just a ball of metal now.


The amazing part is that the boys are both fine. They both walked away. Jordan was not wearing a seat belt, and he didn't suffer any injuries. David was wearing a seat belt, and he had minor injuries. He had several stitches on his face from lacerations and his one ear was swollen shut. He has bruises and small scratches all over his body. But he is fine.


From Rachel's account it's a miracle that they both came out of it fine. She said if you could see the car, you would question why either of them are still alive. I believe that angels were protecting them.


After relaying this information to my mother that they were both OK, she made a good point. She said "What would Jordan's mother do if something happened to him?" While he's only 19 years old, he is invaluable in extreme ways to his family. You see, Jordan's father has severe MS (multiple sclerosis). He was first diagnosed when Jordan was only 5. Jordan is expected to help care for his father. He's the only one in the house who can lift him and take him to the bathroom or the kitchen table or the couch in the living room. He does so many things daily to care for his dad. He is even going to a local college, so he can continue living at home. Moving out is not an option for this kid. He has grown up fast, and he realizes that he plays an important role in the family. I hope that this accident helps him to be a little more cautious from now on.

Not that David isn't invaluable to his family too. He really is. To be honest his mother would probably have a break-down if something horrible ever happened to him. Dave and Jared (my sister's husband) lost their middle brother about 6 years ago. I can't imagine their family going through another loss. They still have not dealt with the last one. In their house it isn't often spoken of, and I think there is a world of hurt still remaining.


Moments like these show us how precious life really is. I am so thankful that these two young men are safe and sound today. God was protecting them for sure.

Value

First I have to let you know I was away for a few days, so I missed out on posting. I'm also catching up on my blog reading and commenting. I have stories to tell and several post ideas (if I can remember them all), so I will be writing more later. For now I'm tired and just feel like reading for a while before heading to bed.

Tonight Matt and I were discussing briefly future children. He mentioned how much he'd like for me to be able to quit tutoring before the next baby would arrive. I have thought that I would keep up my tutoring job for a while. I think I could still handle it with 2 kids, especially with one being a baby.

Then he said IT. I almost couldn't believe it. He said he'd really like for me to not work at all (which we've discussed before). But he said "I really value what you do at home". He went on to say that can't imagine what our evenings/weekends would be like if we both worked full time. He knows that he wouldn't have as much free time, because it would be tied up with both of us keeping up with the house and other things.

I can't imagine what it would be like either. I feel so blessed that I've been able to stay home with my son. Our plan is for me to stay at home until all of our kids are in school. Then I don't know what. Matt says then he just wants me to do what makes me happy. If it means going back to teaching, then so be it. Or if I decide to continue staying at home, that's OK too. (Which I suppose will have to happen if we decide to home school.)

It just meant so much to me to hear him say how much he notices and appreciates what I do here at home and with our son. It is always good to feel like what you do is valuable. Thank you, Matt.

I almost forgot

Thanks for you who participated. Sorry I forgot about you.







It was a fluffernutter sandwich. He ate right through the middle for the ooey gooey goodness. He was a mess, as you can see. Thanks for playing along, but no one figured it out. ;)


I suppose for bonus points if you mentioned peaches, you're right. He did eat those too. You can see them on his tray in the picture on the previous post.

Running away

Oh man, I can't believe I'm doing this. I was inspired by Swistle. She encouraged us to try the Couch to 5K running program. I thought there was no way I could even talk myself into it. Then I read Swistle's post about her first time out. I was thinking maybe, just maybe I could give this a try. So, I did.

When I put Zachariah down for his morning nap, I figured it would be a great time to exercise. I knew there was no way I'd make it out of the house to walk/run, but I do have a Gazelle. I pulled it out and I did the 20 minute walk/run for day 1. I would love if I had a treadmill, or could get outside (when it's not so hot and humid), or a gym membership. That would be better, but since I don't, I'll do what I can. And that's how I started today.

The program calls for 3 days a week. I think I might be able to manage that. That is if I can keep talking myself into it. It really wasn't too hard. I worked up a little sweat without feeling exhausted. Go me! Oh, and I'm totally with Swistle on the fat jiggly thing. That stinks when you're running. It didn't used to bother me, but since having a baby I have a low belly roll. I always had a roll (or two), but now this one hangs awfully low. Guess that's what happens when you carry a baby around for 9 months (and it's a 10 pounder at that).

So, do you think if I keep this up I can lose that roll? I hope so. I started doing well exercising at the beginning of this month until my back starting acting up. Then I wasn't able to do anything until it started feeling better. Now I can, and I did. I'm just glad I started. I was to keep working out, whether it's this program or something else.

Anniversary fun

So Matt and I got away yesterday for our anniversary. Thank you all the for wonderful wishes. (Oh, and Matt did not like that first picture from our wedding I posted. I'll try to find a better one for him later. He thinks he looks drunk in that one, and he never had anything to drink that day. We didn't want alcohol there, plus neither of us were technically old enough for it.)

After church on Sunday, my parents came over to spend the afternoon with Zachariah. Then Matt and I headed out to a neighboring town for lunch. (Or as Matt called it lupper - lunch/supper.) We tried a new restaurant. It was pretty good. We brought at least half of our dinners home. Probably because we ordered an appetizer (which was super yummy crab stuffed mushrooms), then the bring hot rolls, then they bring a salad. That alone is more than I usually eat for lunch. I was getting full before our meals even came out. But I managed to eat about half of it. The rest will make great left-overs for dinner tonight.

Then we went miniature golfing. Matt and I are always competitive with that, but we have so much fun. And of course Matt beat me. It helps that he's a golfer and I'm not. It was fun, and I even had 3 holes-in-one. :D

After golfing we went to the mall there. I couldn't believe all the sales on clothes. Matt bought a pair of jeans for about $6. I saw lots of kids clothes on sale, but I have two problems with buying clothes for Zachariah. He doesn't need any more clothes for the summer, and I have no idea what size to buy him for next summer. Plus I don't want to blow the clothing budget on clothes for next year, when he will need clothes for this fall very soon. Plus he needs more pajamas, because he's too long for all his one-piece sets. Anyway, so I didn't buy anything.

Before we headed home, we stopped at Cold Stone Creamery for ice cream. I had the Birthday Cake Remix. That was the best ice cream I've ever had. I loved the cake batter ice cream. Mmmm. It was a good ending to a fun afternoon. We didn't do anything incredibly romantic, but we truly enjoyed just spending a little time to ourselves.

When we got home, we found that my parents and Zachariah had a great time. They took him out to lunch, and he got his own meal. We never do that, we just cut up things off our plates and give him that. Mom said that he ate more than half of his meal, so I was happy to hear that. They played with him and had so much fun. He took one short nap...in grandpa's lap in the recliner instead of in his bed. Geesh, they spoil this kid. Then my mom gave him oreos, while he was wearing a white shirt. What was she thinking??!! He of course stained it. Then she changed him out of it...into another white shirt! He has a whole closet full of clothes, and that's what she pulled out! I'm starting to think she's been away for this motherhood thing for too long. You wouldn't know she had 3 kids, plus babysat for years after that. A white shirt? Really Mom. Just makes me laugh...what else can I do? But anyway, I know he got lots of love and attention. He tried to leave with them even. Guess Matt and I will have to get away more often. I won't complain about that.

Happy Anniversary

July 29, 2000

I can't believe it's been 7 years now. In some ways it's flown by - I still love you and adore you. In other ways it's been forever - I can't remember what it was like not being married to you. My life has improved greatly in 7 years of marriage, and I have only you to thank, my sweet husband.

July 2002

This next photo was taken just before Matt proposed to me. Yep, he crawled out from under a rock and insisted I take a picture. It took some convincing on his part, because I thought he was hiding something like a bug to scare me. But no, instead, he surprised me with a beautiful ring and a promise to love me forever. And 9 months later we were united as one in marriage.

October 14, 1999We have had so many fantastic years together. We've been through 3 college degrees, 5 jobs, 2 dogs, 1 kid, buying a house, deaths of 5 grandparents, marriages of 3 sisters, and so many other things. I can't imagine doing this without you by my side each step of the way.

I love you more each year. I learn more about you each week. I admire you each day. And I think about you all the time.

I thank you for giving me my beautiful son. He has made me love you even more. And I look forward to traveling this journey of parenthood with you. It won't be easy, but I know we can do it and do it well. We'll lean on each other and learn along the way. As long as we support each other and look to God, we will make it.

March 3, 2006
I knew our lives were taking a different turn when I saw the way you instantly fell in love with our son. You have been and always will be a fantastic father. I can be comforted in knowing that you will always take care of our family to the best of your abilities.

March 4, 2006
Thank you for being my shoulder to cry on.
Thank you for holding my hand through the good and bad.
Thanks for listening to me and caring and valuing what I have to say.

July 8, 2006Thank you for sacrificing many things for me.
Thank you for being so generous with me.
Thank you for having fun with me.

Winter 2006
Thank you for making me laugh.
Thank you for loving me.
Thanks for sticking by me for 7 wonderful years.

July 29, 2000

I love you so much. I will love you forever. And I can't wait to see what the future holds for us together. Happy Anniversary Matt!

A guessing game

I decided to let Zachariah try something a little different for lunch today. I gave it to him, then went to make my lunch. When I checked on him this was what was left.

He devoured the thing. It was so funny. It was all over his face too. What a mess. Hilarious though. So, what did he eat for lunch? Any guesses? I made Matt play the game too. He did figure it out. It wasn't anything too strange. I'll tell you later what it was.

Package

The FedEx package came just a little bit ago.

It was a large box from Hallmark with Flowers & Gifts written on the side. Hmm, I wonder what it is. Plus it had my name on it, so I didn't hesitate to open it like I thought I might.

And when I opened it I found a beautiful bouquet of roses. There was also a large vase and a card in the box.

Matt sent me 2 dozen roses of assorted colors for our anniversary. What a sweetheart. After 7 years he still knows how to show me he loves me.

What could it be?

Oh, I almost forgot. I'm wondering what my husband is up to. He kept asking me if I'd be home tomorrow to accept a FedEx delivery. I told him I should be home most of the day. (I had planned to run a few quick errands.) But last time FedEx just rang the doorbell and left it on the porch anyway. When I asked him what he was expecting, he would not tell me. Hmm. But he did say that I could open the package when it does arrive. Should I? Normally I wouldn't. I'm one of those who doesn't like to peek. I like waiting for surprises. I am thinking about opening this up. I guess I'll see if the package gives me any clues first. Our anniversary is this weekend, so it could have something to do with that. We shall see. Anyone want to take guesses?

It's not about me

When Matt comes home in the evening, I want very little from him. And I ask almost nothing from him. What I want the most is just for him to spend some time with Zachariah. The kid spends all day, every day with me. He sees his daddy less than 2 hours each night during the week. And that's not taking into account that there is something going on that particular evening that takes Daddy away.

Zachariah is too young to understand that Matt sometimes has other things to do. And somehow I find myself hating when I say the following things "Sweetie, Daddy's busy come play with Mommy for now", "Daddy has to do something right now, he'll play with you later", "Let Mommy do that for you, Daddy is busy".

The truth is that Matt has more time to spend with Zachariah then he does in my humble opinion. For instance he will go to the office to pay bills and keep up with the back account. I love that he's interested in takig care of the finances, and he does a great job with it. But, he could do this after Zachariah goes to bed. He likes to go to the garage to lift weights for 10-15 minutes, but this could wait. So many little things like this, he could wait to do.

He does spend time with Zachariah. He loves to take him outside for a little while each evening. He usually lets Zac help him water the garden and flowers.

But Matt will sit and use the computer while I take care of bath time. I do baths every. single. night. I don't mind too badly, but it's something Matt could pitch in and help with to spend a little more time with his kid. He has never offered to do baths. I don't mind taking care of that, but geesh, he could offer once in a while. I just feel like he's missing out on too many things.

Being a great father is good. Matt is a fantastic father. I guess being a mother is different. I don't understand why he just won't spend more time with Zachariah. After Zachariah goes to bed, Matt generally does nothing. He sits and watches TV or plays games online. So I know he has time to do all those other important things then. I suppose maybe it's enough just to be near Zachariah. Maybe that's different between us. I don't get it. Truly it's not about me, though, it's about our son.



***This is one of those posts that I used to vent. I'm not even sure I should post it. But it's my blog, and I can complain if I want to.

Angelic

Who came and replaced my baby with this angelic being today? Come on, fess up, who did it?

Well, maybe he's just being nice since he kept me up for a while last night. And the night before that he was an absolute grump - almost inconsolable.

But I can't help wonder if this means tonight or tomorrow or next week he will turn on me. Am I in for a hellish weekend? I guess only time will tell.

This morning Zachariah slept in. He usually gets up between 7:00 and 7:30AM. I don't get up until he does most days, so I wait until his morning nap to get my shower. That's usually around 9:00 or sometimes a little earlier. Today I got up out of bed at 8:20. I didn't hear a peep coming from the nursery, so I got my shower. Still no peeping, and I got dressed, ate breakfast, and checked my e-mail and started reading my blog roll. About 9:15 I started hearing him make noises, and finally by 9:30 he was yelling for me. I got him up and dressed. Then I fed him breakfast. Usually that seems never-ending, because he has constant demands. He woke up happy this morning, didn't complain about diaper changes or getting dressed. After a happy breakfast, he happily played with his toys, ran around the room, and didn't get into trouble like he normally does. He read books with me and wanted to cuddle a few times. I could tell he was getting tired after a while. But he wanted to stay up, so I let him until he was pretty tired. He went down for a nap around 11:30-12:00. And get this...he just woke up at about 2:45PM. (He pretty much took his morning and afternoon nap all in one.) I almost had to wake him up, because he still hadn't eaten lunch and I go tutor in a little while.

He has been in a great mood since he got up from his nap, and I'm hoping that this will continue the rest of the day. Boy, what I wouldn't give for more days like this.

Harry Who?

So, I got this idea after reading Kelsey's comment on my last post. Kelsey was interested in what I was reading. And she asked if it was Harry Potter.

The short answer is no, it was not. I was reading "Castles" by Tracie Peterson. I love Tracie Peterson, and I've been trying to read more of her books that I haven't yet. When I finished that I started "Kansas" that she co-authored. Peterson's books are all Christian historical fiction/romance. I have enjoyed every book of hers that I've read.

Anyway, onto Harry Potter. I guess I'm not on that band-wagon. It seems like I read the first book. How bad is it that I don't even know for sure? It was good, but I didn't get as into it as other people I know. I remember reading parts of the (maybe) 2nd or 3rd book to students when I did my student teaching. I think that's why I read the first book. I believe I read it after a friend recommended it in our Children's Literature class.

There is an issue in my house with the Harry Potter books. Matt does not like them. He's never read them and swears he never will (he's not much of a reader, so he most likely won't). He will not watch the movies. His opinion on the matter is that the books are about witchcraft which we don't believe in, so why would we want to read about things like that.

My argument is it's just a book. It's meant to be imaginative. It's fun and not real. I've actually thought about reading the whole series.

My understanding is I know where he's coming from. Witchcraft is a real and awful thing. We do not believe in it. Well, I take that back, we believe it is real and exists but it goes against what we believe. There are some personal issues that we've had to deal with pretty closely to this issue. I don't want to go into them here, but know that the spiritual world is real.

Anyway, where Matt stands he does not even want the books in his house. It upsets me that he can't see my side of the issue. It's not like I've been dying to read the books or watch the movies, so it doesn't bug me much. And where I come from Matt is the head of my household, so I am respecting his stand on this.

Missing

I've been MIA this weekend. I haven't read blogs. I haven't written blogs. What did I do that was so time consuming and important? Nothing really.

I got wrapped up in a good book and finished it last night. Since I had read so much of that, I really didn't feel like reading online too. And Matt had been using my laptop most of the weekend.

Several of you wanted to know how Thursday night went. We went to the program at church with Zachariah. He seemed to enjoy watching it for a while. He would stand on the pew between us and "dance" to the music and watch all the lights and actors. But then...he was up...he was down...he was climbing on us and the pew. He was playing peek-a-boo with the friends behind us. It got exhausting. He wasn't being bad, but this kid has a lot of energy. And it was hard to keep all that energy contained to a 4 foot area. To be fair I thought he was doing pretty well. About 10 minutes before the intermission he started getting really anxious and LOUD. Matt quickly scooped him up and left the sanctuary. He walked around the lobby with him for a while, so I could watch the performance. So at intermission I packed up all the toys and snacks that we'd tried to keep Zachariah entertained with and headed out to the lobby. I told Matt we could leave. At this point it was already an hour and a half past his bedtime. Knowing there was at least another hour left of the performance, I knew there was no way we'd make it to the end unless Matt just stayed in the lobby the rest of the time with the kid. We left. And it was OK. I was glad we got away for a little while. And I do know how the show ended, because it was the same performance as last year only with a new twist.

For most of the weekend we just stayed at home. Boring. But I'm glad that I got to read my book and finish it. And Saturday morning Matt even took Zachariah out for a while, so I had some peace and quiet. I cleaned. Oh well. I hope you all had a great weekend. Welcome to Monday.

Animal sounds #1

Here is a short video of Zachariah's elephant noise. Someone once asked "What do you do for the elephant sound?" Well, it's like a tight-lipped raspberry noise. (Or if you played a trumpet like me, it's just that minus the trumpet.) He loves making this sound. We find it adorable. I taught him to do it and put his arm up like an elephant trunk, but that takes too much time so he usually skips that part.

I've been trying to get more animal noises from him to make a video, but this is as far as I've gotten. It's my first attempt at putting video online. I know it's short, but it's all I could get him to do for now. Enjoy.

A night out?

Tonight was supposed to be a fun night out. But it's looking like maybe that won't be the case now. Only time will tell.

The plan was for Matt, Zachariah, and I to go to a church event at a local park. We went last year to this performance in the park, and it was so much fun. A group from a college comes and does a drama with singing and dancing. We loved it. Of course that's when Zachariah was only 4 months old. He was content to sit in his infant seat for a while, then he sat in our laps. He just enjoyed being outdoors.

We had it all thought out. We knew being outside we were more likely to keep Zachariah's attention. Plus there will be other people around for him to watch. Sounded like fun. We were going to head out there a little early and let him play on the playground. That might help get rid of some excess energy, especially since we'll be keeping him up past his bedtime.

The plans were good. Then....then it rained...off and on all day long. So, we've heard from the church recently that tonight's performance has been moved indoors to the church instead of the park. Oh no. That does not sound as easy to do. Zachariah cannot sit still very long in church.

Last Sunday I tried to leave him in the nursery. He usually will cry for a few minutes when I leave, but then he's OK and goes to play with all the fun toys. So, as hard as it is, I make myself leave him even if he's crying a bit. Otherwise I would never enjoy the service. I thank God that we have such a nice, caring nursery staff. They are wonderful people. But no, last week he cried and cried and cried. They had to page me from the service to come get him. They felt bad calling, but I'm glad they did. He was so mad and inconsolable by the time I got there. It even took me a few minutes to get him calmed down. And I spent the rest of the service in the nursery with him.

So, you see where this is going, right? I think Matt will get to sit and enjoy the performance while I'm out in the lobby with a squirmy toddler. To be fair Matt did mention that this would be harder to take Zachariah to. But I want to go so badly that I'd like to give it a try. Maybe he'll surprise us. HA! As long as Matt's open to the idea of leaving early if that's what's necessary, then I'd like to go. Otherwise, I'll be the one missing out again. Wish me luck!

Stages

Today as I enjoyed hearing my son's laughter in the room, I started thinking about how much fun this age is. I like where he's at right now.

Zachariah is 16 months old. He is not talking yet, but he tries to repeat certain things we tell him to say. Like "hallelujah" and he says "la la lu" or something like that. Adorable. Other than that he uses sign language to communicate what he wants. He knows "eat" VERY well. And now he's using that to let us know when he wants something (non-food related too). He wants to look at the picture you have, he signs "eat". Pretty funny, but also shows him trying to use what he knows to communicate.

I know he's absorbing words that I teach him. He obeys commands pretty well (as to be expected). I can tell him to go get his cup, and he'll go find it. He usually knows right where he left something. And he's a typical toddler that I can tell him not to do something and he won't listen, though.

I loved the newborn/baby stages, but I was so busy fulfilling needs that I felt like I had to put my own needs on the back burner. Now I can have fun with my child and have time for myself too. He's getting more independent each day. He's content to sit and play with toys or read books on the floor, so I can get my blogging fix or check my e-mail or maybe do a load of laundry. (I usually save that fun stuff for nap time.)

I can read him a book, and see that he's taking it all in. He loves to point out cars and any kind of animal. He recognizes elephants, dogs, and cows especially and will make the corresponding animal noise. Or I can show him how to stack blocks or put shapes in the right place or pedal his little tricycle. He is a sponge.

I crawl after him on the floor growling and "attack" his belly. He will fall over laughing hysterically. Or I tickle his little feet. Or "eat" his toes. All of these get laughter every time.

He likes to shout out "ahh" with bright eyes from whatever he's doing and finds it hilarious. He always looks at us to see if we respond. If we do, he laughs even more and does it again. He laughs any time he hears someone else. And it's not a real laugh, it's a totally fake "HA HA" kind of laugh. So funny to us though. Sometimes it just makes us laugh harder, then he laughs, then we laugh...you can see how that keeps going.

It's all these things together that make me want to hug him and kiss his soft little cheeks all day long...and I do...every chance I get. And today while I was sitting on the floor, because he wanted to rock in my chair (by himself, thank you very much), I realized how much I love this little boy. I started seeing him for the little person he's becomming. And it amazes me that I play such a big role in this.

I wonder "Will he remember these days?" "What will he think about my looking back on his youth when he's all grown up?" "Does it matter to him that I play and entertain him like I do?" And I think YES, yes it does. His face lights up when he plays with me on the floor. And I see the wonder and amazement when i show him something new. Or the happiness when I praise him for something well done.

For these reasons and so much more, I love this dear little (ornery) boy. God truly blessed my life when He gave him to me.

What a boy wants

Last week I took Zachariah to the local library. I needed some new books to read. And I've been doing plenty of reading since then. While we were there I went to the children's section to get a few board books for Zachariah. Oh course he pulled the first one he saw off the shelf.

This boy is a book lover. It's not unusual to find him sitting with a pile of books around him just looking at page after page. And if you can get him to sit still long enough, he'll let you read the same book to him 3 times in a row. I love that he loves books.

One of the books that I found for him at the library is quickly becoming a favorite. I think I'm going to have to give in and go buy one for him. It's "My First Tractor Board Book". He has had a fascination with cars, trucks, and anything with tires for a few months now. Then he rode with Matt on the lawn tractor. He loved it. Then Grandpa took him for a ride on his lawn tractor (around and around their yard just for the entertainment of the boy...spoiled...nooo!). About a month ago we went to watch a parade. Zachariah's favorite part was the tractors (mostly antique) that were in the parade. He stopped whatever he was doing and watched at them with wide eyes until they were out of sight. That's when I really saw his love for tractors.

He goes up to anything with tires and says "rmm rmm" - which translates to "vroom vroom". Cars, trucks, tractors, bicycles, anything with tires. So, this book for him was pure heaven. He looks at each page with awe and wonder. He especially loves the page that shows the colors of tractors. Every time I ask him which is his favorite color, he points to the green John Deere tractor. Every time! I didn't know he knew enough to pick one out like that, but he does. Our lawn mower is a John Deere, so that could be the reason. It's rather cute.

Last night he heard a noise in our neighborhood that was the sound of heavy machinery backing up. He stopped dead in his tracks (following his daddy, which he loves) and turned around to head towards the sound. A lot near us is clearing some dirt that they'd piled up. There was a skid-steer loader moving dirt. How do I know it was a skid-steer loader, from the tractor book, of course. He watched that thing for 15-20 minutes. This is the kid who won't stand still for 5 seconds normally. He was completely mesmerized.

Whether I am ready or not, I'm raising a boy. And he is 100% pure boy!

Lost love

Do you have a long lost love from your past? I have to say Matt was my one and only love. We started dating so young. There was a moment when I thought I was falling for a friend of mine, but I quickly discovered he would never be anything more than a friend. Matt had the same experience with a friend of his. Once in a while I run into this guy that I was friends with. I will tell you a story.


But the whole reason I thought about this is that Matt recently "found" his old friend. He's been trying to find her for years now. Does it bother me that he was searching for her? No, not at all. I was friends with her too. She knew Matt first and was better friends with him, but I'm OK with that.


This friend, let's call her S, got married one week after us. We happened to see her the day after her wedding by pure coincidence. Matt and I had returned the night before from our honeymoon. Then we went to my parents to open gifts that next afternoon. We were loading all the gifts in our cars to take back home. S just happened to be driving by with her new husband and saw Matt outside my parents' house. She knew my parents lived near there, so they turned around to see if it was truly us. It was, and it was nice to see her and meet her new husband. After that we never heard from her. We knew where she had moved to with her husband, but they moved and we couldn't find a new address. Well, we found out now that she had two kids (starting right after they got married) with this husband. She at some point divorced him, had a child with another man, and just a few weeks ago married him. Seems funny to me that she's been through all of that in the same span of time that Matt and I have been married and had one kid. And we are still very happily married. I know stories like hers happen often though.


Matt met S while we were in high school (while we were dating actually). They were in a church youth group together. They hit it off right away and knew that they could be friends. He told me about her, and I eventually met her. She was a super nice, caring person. Very genuine. Through knowing S we found out that she had a very troubled life. Her mother tried to abort her. She was raised by her aunt and uncle, who were to her Mom and Dad. There was a past of sexual abuse, and she had a general mistrust towards men. (Who could blame her, really.) But she saw something different in Matt immediately. She knew he could be trusted. Matt was a great friend to S. I think that she secretly (or maybe not so secretly) starting liking him as more than a friend. I was slowly becoming aware of this, and I was slightly jealous. After all he was my boyfriend. I don't know how long he had known her before he started thinking he had feelings for her too. And I don't remember for sure, but I think he told one of our other mutual friends about his feelings. But he very much still liked me and didn't want that to change. Somehow he ended up talking to me about it. I told him how I honestly felt about it. I saw their relationship more as a friendship or a brother/sisterly love. They got along very well and were good for each other, but I don't think a relationship would have lasted. After telling him that, I let him know that he had a decision to make, and I would wait until he decided but I was not leaving him. I don't know what made him see the light, but something did. And he soon realized that he could only be her friend, and he wanted to keep me as a girlfriend.

I still wonder about things that happened between them. I know nothing physical ever happened, but something emotional definitely started to take place. But our relationship in high school was a completely different story too. We changed and grew to love each other and respect each other more and more the older we got. (Although we didn't get too much older...we got engaged while in college when I was barely 19 and he was barely 20. We got married 9 months later.)

So, I do honestly think in this case it is good for Matt to reconnect with this old friend. I hope that they can catch up on each other's lives a little more and maybe develop a new friendship. How do/would you feel about your spouse rekindling an old friendship like this?


***I was going to post about the *almost* relationship I had with another boy, but I think that's too much story telling for this post. So, I'll save that for another time. It's a long story in itself.